A revelation that has been stirring up inside of me for the past few months is one two folds. The first is how much Jesus loves me and the second is how He gives me all I need to accomplish the task and that the task has purpose!
The second fold has been much harder for me to grasp and believe. When I get up everyday, pull my khakis on grab a red shirt from the ground and lace up my worn out tennis shoes, its hard for me to see the purpose in it all. I walk out the door thinking about my education, wondering how am I going to use my knowledge of Shakespeare and Fitzgerald going to help me pick up shoes? How is knowing how to create a sentence and research a topic going to help me answer the same questions day in a day out? I know that God has a plan and a purpose for everything but really, how is working in this job bringing His purpose? A few months ago, God started working on humbling my heart, and speaking truth into these places where I allowed the enemy to place his lies. The truth that God first spoke to me is in Jeremiah chapter 29. First I just have to say that if you think your job is hard, read Jeremiah who for most of his life had to tell people really bad news from the Lord and then get beaten or thrown into prison because of it. I mean, picking up shows is awesome in light of Jeremiah's job! In chapter 29 Jeremiah is telling God's people that they are in exile and will be there for a while. Instead of whining and complaining about and wondering when they would be released God desires for them to put down roots, get married, have children and marry off you children. He is basically saying, live life and really live life because you will be here for while...70 years to be exact.
God says, "For I know the plans that I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call up Me and come and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart. I will be found by you declares the Lord and I will restore your fortunes and will gather you from all the nations and from all the places where I have driven you, declares the Lord, and I will bring you back to the place from where I sent you into exile. Jeremiah 29:11-14
What stands out to me is that first God has a plan. God doesn't go into a situation without a full game plan. And with that plan His desire is to bring you future and a hope. Also, God's plan ALWAYS includes us drawing closer to Him, for us to call on His name. His ultimate desire is for us to know Him, to know Him in a new way and call on His name. Through His plan, His calling, His direction he desires us to search Him and fully know in that situation. In the end of these verses God gives His people a promise, a promise that exile will end and on the other side He will restore all that was lost, God will bring His people back to Himself. When we are sent into exile we will always come out on the other side, stronger and fuller than when we went into it...when we spend our exile searching out God!
When I read these verses a few months ago I realized something, I was in a sort of exile in this job. My job I have right now is not a permanent job, my life's calling is not to pick shoes up for the rest if it. No, God has sent me into this place for a purpose, and that purpose involves prosperity, hope and a future. Also, in this exile He desires to know me even more, from me to cling to Him, to seek Him out and search with all my heart His direction, His love and His provision. God has reminded me how awesome a provider He is. I have a job when so many do not. I am able to work and help our household get out of debt. If that was the only reason, shouldn't that be enough? The truth is some days it is enough but most days its not. I have struggled with feeling inadequate and worthless. I see people's reaction and hear their tone when I tell them where I work. I have struggled with feeling then need to validate and justify my reasoning behind my choice of employment. Can I just stop here and say, WHO CARES WHERE YOU WORK!!!!! It has been a long journey with God to feel good about myself especially when I am surrounded by all of these amazingly successful people. In the world's eyes, yes what I do is menial and most days I am treated that way by the community. But through God's eyes, MAN!!! He is bragging on me in Heaven. He is saying, "Look at Amy, look at how well she is picking up those shoes. Look how great of a job she is doing. Look at how well she helped that person. Look at the joy she brought to her co-worker. Look at her singing while she folds clothes. Man, I love this girl...she is so AWESOME!!!! And you know what, no matter what you are doing, whether its working in a big corporation to "important things", or taking someone's order, or teaching a student, or training your child how to use the potty God is saying, "Look at my child, Look at how Awesome she (or he) is! I love her! I am so Proud of her! Did you see how well she handled that situation? "
If I am honest I don't always go into work feeling the purpose that God has for me but the truth is, He has a greater purpose than I can ever imagine. I try everyday to walk out that purpose and I know one day, I will walk out of "exile" into a new calling and a new purpose and I will walk into my future with hope and prosperity.
